Wednesday, May 05, 2010

History class

I refuse to live regrets – I learn from the things I shouldn’t have done.   But I look back on the past year and I realize that I’ve become someone I don’t want to be.  It’s done now and I refuse to look back.  But I know that I’ve crossed the line of experiemental and Christian.  Now I’ve come to the point that I have to sink or swim.   I have to find my place in life. 
I have to stop going to steak n shake and I have to find stability in my life.   I want to be someone that people look up to and right now I am not being that person.  I’ve got to get back to who I am and who I want to be.
I love life, but with sin comes burdens and ache.  Lately, I haven’t been loving life very much.   Sure, now I know how the average joe lives.  Sure, now I can say ive lived as someone else.  But I don’t like it.   I don’t like any of it.   I miss the days where I had friends and we would just sit around and do nothing.   I miss the days where I could randomly go skateboardin or swimming.  I miss the days where I really knew the people I hung out with. 
I’m ready to get back to life and loving living. 

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