Monday, October 24, 2011

First kiss

Last night, it was achieved.... and just as i would have had it : )

... have i mentioned that i'm in love with this boy?  I mean head over heels in love....
The kind of love that would make jesus very happy.  

-beemo.  aka.  Mrs Clarke (oooh i love the way that sounds.

To my friends

Invitations by Jonathan Clark

Check out more at our website

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


So many things i still want to do in my life:

learn to sail
free fall
advanced cuddling in the wide outdoors
ride bare back (and not fall off)
raise a baby
go to a circus
breath fire
own a VW (bug or van)
go to a ball
Go to a geek convention

... note to self, add these to my 1000000 things to do list.

The world has stopped spinning

or at least it feels like it.  I have some friends that i see every day and some that i dont see very often at all but sometimes the later of those two are even better than the ones i see the most......   Right now, i feel like the entire world should know what has happened this morning.  How can anyone go on about their day like nothing has happened?  When a friend is lost, it feels like the world has lost the most important thing... the thing that makes it go around.  and the pain is an emptyness more than anything.  It's not like saying goodbye and It's different than heartbreak.  All of the memories are still there and always will be, but there is a part of those memories that is ripped out along with the friend that helped make them

I guess some people live life as a dead man, but at least our friend died with a life full of living.

Feb 22, 2007 I had a friend die... even to this day it seems sureal and it is still a date burnt into my head.   Ryan is even better a friend than him and i have no doubt that today is a date that will burn hotter than 9/11.

Oct. 19th, 2011.  Today's date, and a date i'll never be able to wash away.

The world is spinning, but i can't feel it.

The doctor.

Ryan Jones = awesome.  

I never had the talent to play violin like he did, he rocked it.  I also never had the general creativity that him (and his girl, Essay or his boy, Spaz) did.  He sure inspired.  They once told me that you shouldn't need halloween or any holiday in order to dress up or just dress silly.... i loved that.   Now halloween is here, i feel like i should dress for him....  and if i can come up with something i will nix emma stone in a second.

But like i said on FB, i'm sure Ryan just took his tardis and his regenerated body and is on another world, saving the galaxy.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


I'm sure it wouldn't be a bad idea to have a blog just for all my wedding venting, but i don't want to forget about loft-apt.....    so here it is.

Steven and i have most of our planning done, but there are still small details left....
such as the programs.   We're not printing programs due to the hassle and the budget (we want to keep things fun and simple)  
but there are lots of good ideas for programs that don't involve a whole lot of planning...
i like the idea of having one large program (like these chalkboards or the flyer from "" :

charli's attire

I'm hunting for Charli a suit : )

.... now on the hunt for cute postcard stamps.

wedding website: check   check it.

and to rsvp:

Sunday, October 09, 2011

free falling

I might not have free fell this weekend, but i did climb out of the plane, hold on to the wing for dear life and then let go.....   Skydiving:  check.  

And now i'm addicted.   The first jump was sloppy, the second jump was beautiful.   Now i can continue to get my licence (only 23 jumps left :))

Friday, October 07, 2011

man of my dreams

He bought me a converter for my faucet after reading my post about out door spigots : )   he is the man of my dreams…. Literally sometimes.  When he’s not in my dreams I wake up wishing he was there to comfort me from what was in my dreams. 
I was telling him yesterday that it’s funny how different our love is from everything else that I’ve experienced in life…. Because my love for him began from the respect I have for him and when he shows me he loves me I actually feel like he would stand up for me despite ANYONE ELSE. 
I know one day soon I will get to paint his walls and upholster his couch, but what makes it amazing is knowing that when I get frusterated with what ever project I’m working on he will be beside me helping.   I can’t wait to have him with me forever and always.  I know that I haven’t posted much lately and when I have it’s been more with personal life than  the inspiration that I prefer to talk about. ..   Over the next few months I’m sure I’ll have a TON of inspiration to talk about (wedding planning is well on its way)  and in 4 months or so I will have a different house to begin working on : ) yay for blank canvas.  And with my baby Charli I also have the task of making every project puppy proof….   But I guess that is probably killing two birds with one stone since I hope to be having babies eventually (which will add more projects)  yay for a future full of inspiration and decorations.  
…. the first project will probably be a co ed bed room : )  That is one thing I’ve never really had to conquor.  I’ve worked on a boys room before, but it wasn’t my room too.  STOKED.  Future, here I come.   

Keep checking back, the next few months will be wedding inspiration which might poor over into daily life more than some would expect ( paper table cloths and crayons for center pieces.  Casual dress required hehehe ) 

octoberfest as a word

Since when has “octoberfest” been a word?  When I first saw it as a seasonal beer I didn’t think anything because I though they were being creative but now mernards is using it in their seasonal ad “octoberfest sale”??  Guess its unofficially a word now : ) yay for new words.  

Saturday, October 01, 2011

summary of the rest of my life

I look back on the past five years and i feel like those 5 years have had more life than the rest of my life put together.   From my first heartbreak, the bear, to being engaged to a politian, wts, to losing and finding and loving God.   But after all of those rollercoasters i have finally come to the rest of my life.  His name is steve clarke.  I've talked about him before, we dated back mid 2008.  I was so torn up still from my first heart break that i had to walk away.  But they say that if you let your love walk away and they dont come back that they never really loved you and if they do come back they really did love you.... I didn't do it on purpose but he's been the only man (other than my father) that i ever really respected with even my heart.  He's the breeze to my sail.  The thump to my heart.  and i ended up back with him again, expecting to simply be his friend but hoping that the feelings in my heart were still mutual.  Turns out they were.  Now i'm beyond stoked to be his wife.  4 months and counting.  The rest of my life has begun and i can't wait.  with my moms wedding dress altered and the bridal party attire decided, the plans are well set.  They say some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.... true story.   The pain i've gone through is well worth the joy That God is sending my way :)

I know there will be fights and disagreements and rough times.  I know there will be days that i regret saying i do.   I'm looking forward to all of it.