I think it might be the idea of being married that is more appealing than being married to him … . I want to be taken care of and charrished. I want to know that I have a loving husband to come home to and take care of. But It’s not worth being hurt again. So I’ve got 2 months and I’m off to the big city. I can’t wait to see another life.
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Cinco de mayo
Well. I think I still want to marry will. But I CAN NOT do this to myself. I can’t allow myself to fall inlove with him again. I can’t bear another break off and I can’t allow myself to marry someone who will never be decisive. My parents keep asking me if I really want to marry someone who will not follow through on the things they say. And not only that – I can NOT get the image of him yelling at me from across the street out of my head.